The Test




Today's piece comes from Sarah.  It features something we've all faced at some point: The Test of Doom.


The Test

Tick tock tick tock on the clock. Time speeds away while poor, Ronald Bloom, fidgets with his pencil, as the exponential nervousness is eating him alive.


“You will have one and a half hours to complete your first sixth grade social studies test of the year,” announced Ms. Trenchly.


“More like test of doom! Gosh, kill me now,” Robert thought.


The test of doom was being distributed, still warm from the printer. Suddenly, “PLOP!” A daunting booklet had been left on his desk by Patty-Passer-Outer, with a snicker and a grin. He looked on the right side of his desk; a whopping four and a half page test booklet, and three page answer booklet.


“Pssssssssst!” whispered Ronald’s best friend Cecilia. “If I die before this is over, will you please tell my mother I love her?” Ron chuckled.


“Is there something you would like to share with the class, Ron?” shouted Ms. Trenchly, with her famous evil glare.


“N-N-No-No, Ma’am,” stuttered Ron.


Everyone despises Ms. Trenchly. Even the suck-ups and goody-two-shoes students secretly hate her. She’s the teacher that expects you to know everything already, even if she hasn’t taught it yet. She creeps people out, picks on her students, and calls us stupid. Last but not least, Ms. Trechly is the teacher that thinks she’s hip!! HA! Some teachers are... just not her.  
For example, she’s around 50 years old and she still dresses as if she’s 25! She tries to straighten her hair, she shops at Abercrombie and Fitch, and she wears her makeup like the eighth grader girls do!


“Okay, you may start... now!” said Ms. Trenchly.


Studies show that most kids spend twenty percent of their time actually taking a test and the other eighty percent simply procrastinating. Yup, that would be me. Students procrastinate on almost anything. Students procrastinate if they have to do homework, any type of cleaning, tests, quizzes, chores, and getting up in the morning. For some reason, it’s just what we do.

“What’s first on my agenda for taking the test? Hmmm... procrastination!”

thought Ron.


First, Ron fidgets with his pencil, and pretends to look through the test, “reading” each question before he started. Then he pulls a classic. His signature fake sneeze. Then, he walks up to go get a tissue. But wait, there are no tissues! “Ms. Trenchly, may I get a tissue from the bathroom?”


“Sure Ron, but just get a tissue,” said Ms. Trenchly.


Ron cockily walked out of the room smirking at his success.


On the other hand, motivated Cecilia was already one fourth of the way done and smiling confidently while doing so! It was almost as if she enjoyed this abnormally cruel torture. Cecilia and Ron are absolute opposites, and many people wondered why they would be friends.


Ron was the messiest person in the whole grade, except for his appearance. He had a bedroom floor you couldn’t see, a binder that didn’t know what a divider was, and my goodness his locker - nobody at Mildred D. Middle School ever dared to peek inside.


Then, there was Cecilia. She had a room like no other. Her clothing was organized by the seasons. She had shirts for winter, summer, spring, and fall. There were four different drawers and one closet for her hair necessities, shoes, and pants. There was also a homework desk with sections for pencils, paper, textbooks, and laptop, which was gleaming as if it was new. Lastly, her always made bed with a polka dot comforter was tucked so tightly, you could flip a quarter off of it.


Cecilia was the inventor of the divider, and the binder, which were stowed with care in her locker. Cecilia had a system. She would have one shelf for each subject in her locker. This system followed almost exactly the same principles as her room strategies.


Meanwhile, Ron was actually taking the test! He was starting to get frustrated so he faked another sneeze and went and got a tissue. He only had four questions, and for not studying, Ron was doing surprisingly well.


Cecilia had been quietly reading for twenty minutes and Ron was just about to finish his last question. This was a very big thing for him to accomplish. He took four steps to Ms. Trenchly’s desk and with a gigantic sigh of relief, he stated proudly, “I’m finished!”

“Well that’s great Ronald but my directions were to leave the test on your desk and I will collect it when everybody is finished. But I’m so very glad to know that Ronald Bloom is finished! She said loud to the class, with much sarcasm. The whole class joined in a quiet laughter.


Even though Ron had been humiliated in front of his class, he still did finish this impossible test. He was pretty happy with himself and he thought he would get a solid 90%. Just wait until he gets it back.